Vision

Our world is rapidly changing and we need to find ways of engaging uncertainty and fear.
As we face finitude and crisis, I want us to be able to retain our ability to cooperate.
I want us to be able to hold love for one another, not succumbing to fear, othering, hatred and violence.

For this we need a culture which supports peace.

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Why I do What I do

I believe in order to make anything we do in the direction of change sustainable (whether it is action to stop wrongs or constructive action to build the future we want to see), we need a supportive culture. The culture we are currently living in is supporting the destruction and depletion of our planet. It also supports violent ways of relating with ourselves and each other, perpetuating pain and suffering. Therefore, we need cultural change and that is what I am working towards.

Nonviolent Communication is a spiritual practice, as meditation can be called a spiritual practice. It’s about observing ourselves, other human beings, our relationships with them and communication with ourselves and them.
NVC puts connection first. This allows people to understand each other at the heart level, making the flow of gifts, of giving and receiving, natural.
With this NVC has a radical potential to bring about change, as it questions currently dominant cultural norms.

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Relationship

• Do you long for togetherness with another person, but again and again you end up in arguments or disconnection?
• Is there jealousy you don’t know how to be with that is eating up your relationship?
• Do you feel desperate and sometimes think it’s impossible to agree on something together?

Whether you are in an intimate relationship, a friendship, polyamorous, neighbourly or in family relationships, sometimes these relationships can become painful or are outright disfunctional. As human beings we can only fully become ourselves in relationship with others. Relationships are both the biggest threat to safety at times and the greatest window for healing.
I can help restore connection, understanding and trust. It does not always happen quickly and the process can feel intense. If both (all) of you want it, I can facilitate the dialogue between you.

I have personal experience with being in polyamorous relationships. I want to offer my experience, skills and insights for people people being in (or open to) consensual, intimate and caring connection with multiple people. My experience tells me that these relationships can bring out a lot and have a lot of potential for personal and collective healing of past traumas. At the same time our own traumas sometimes get in the way and block us from having the connection and intimacy we long for. I’d be honored to accompany you and offer empathy as well as work with you on shifting communication patterns.

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Testimonials

I really appreciate what I experience as your relaxed, confident clarity with attention to detail. I’m remembering your conflict transformation skills, persistence and courage as I see it from when we were together at camp in the summer. I’m also seeing you as incredibly resourceful […] Annie Scott, NVC Trainer

I’m really enjoying participating in the practice group that Kirstin facilitates - it meets my need for challenge, discovery, growth, to learn, for stimulation and empathy - within an environment where I feel safe and at ease. I notice that Kirstin’s honesty and openness both by email and during the sessions encourages others to contribute likewise. Kirstin seems knowledgeable and confident, always providing constructive feedback on our practice of conflict facilitation which enables me to discover, grow, learn etc.. JoW, Conflict Facilitation Practice Group Participant